Flowing Downhill

Are you a planner or would you rather go with the flow? Both styles work, if they don’t stretch to rigid or fickle extremes. I like to make at least tentative plans, which I’ll happily change unless I’ve scheduled other commitments around them. Having a default avoids the discomfort of gazing out into the void or lacking a reason to get out of bed.

I’m learning that some friends don’t appreciate hearing a suggested plan before the last minute, even if it comes with alternative plans B, C, and D. Such a suggestion seems to make them feel trapped. Apparently it interferes with joyful impulsivity. My temperament is unlikely to change, but I’m trying to keep my mouth shut longer with such folks about the possibilities and preferences playing in my brain.

Alone at home, faced with unforeseen glitches—so-and-so is running late, the delivery won’t come till tomorrow—the Taoist image of flowing water is my model of adaptability. My ideal, coming upon an unexpected rock in the stream, is to flow calmly around it. Does that mean I’m a go-with-the-flow type after all? Not really, just a planner who adapts as needed. The intent to keep flowing downhill, one way or another, feels better than flowing with no intent whatever.

Both styles work. The occasional challenge is for people of different styles to work together in comfort. And, for me, to remember when to keep my mouth shut.

Image: Photo by Michael Kroul on Unsplash.